Book & Movie Explore Challenges of Marriage

Doris Lessing in her 1950 novel, "The Grass is Singing," many of Edith Wharton's stories, and the recent movie "The Painted Veil" explore the tragic consequences of the socially upheld expectation of women to marry. In today's culture, women still feel compelled to "make a good match" even if they consider themselves modern or progressive.

Kitty Garstin, played by Naomi Watts in the 2006 film "The Painted Veil" was confronted by her family who implied that they no longer wished to financially support her and that it was time for her to get married, thus becoming someone else's burden. This film was set in the 1920's and Kitty did not have the skills and society did not have the infrastructure to allow a woman of her class to earn her own income and thereby support herself. Kitty's only path to "independence" was to get married, even if she didn't want to, or as in this case, was not in love with her suitor. Her marriage led her on a downward tailspin to the bleak, grim lands of inner China to a town decimated by a cholera outbreak. Left here, isolated from her previous life, Kitty is forced to not only grow up but to also forge her own path and identity.

Doris Lessing's female character, Mary Turner of "The Grass is Singing" does not fare as well as Kitty Garstin. The story opens with her murder and then back tracks to how she arrived at such a fatal ending. Mary Turner was unlike Kitty, and more like some of Edith Wharton's women, she worked and supported herself even if the income was meager. Mary Turner was successful with her office job and socially successful. She was happy and independent until she overheard some of her friends criticizing her for remaining single. Mary felt shame at their stigma, as if being single meant that she was incomplete or undesirable, instead of single by her own choice. Many women still experience this same stigma today. They hear exclamations like "Why is a nice girl like you still single?"

Mary, like Kitty, enters into a hostile, brutal married environment. It isn't that the husbands are horrible but where they live as the result of their marriage leaves them isolated. Edith Wharton's women also often leave a life of some independence to get married and "become fulfilled and respectable" only to find themselves in a bitter, often devastating struggle to survive. (Read "The Age of Innocence" and "Bunner Sisters")

Women's literature often explores the reconciliation of individual identity and marriage (whether it is one filled with love or not).

Looking for more?

• Novel "The Grass is Singing" by Doris Lessing, 1950 This novel is well written and is an interesting manifestation of how people’s choices govern their lives. It is set in Rhodesia (now South Africa) and among other things, depicts the class struggle between British settlers and the native African population.
  
• Movie: "The Painted Veil" starring Naomi Watts and Edward Norton, 2006 This movie is a visually stunning film. It is a quiet film with endearing characters and gripping struggle. It is based on the 1925 novel by W. Somerset Maugham, which I have not read.
  
• Doris Lessing audio clips – excerpt readings and interviews
  
• Biography of Doris Lessing, a winner of the Nobel Prize for Literature
  
• To learn about more women who inspire us and who guide us, please read my articles at
  Famiss – Women’s Success History & Portraits
  

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Exploring the Dim Recesses of Our Imagination

Have you struggled to express an idea because you felt that others would think you were crazy? Have you ever thought that if others could read your thoughts they would think you were a freak? The creators of the movie "Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus" imagine how famous American photographer, Diane Arbus felt about her art and her private world.

Movie Review: Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus
2006 film starring Nicole Kidman and Robert Downing Jr.

According to this film, Diane Arbus considered herself a freak because of the inner workings of her mind. Diane (played by Nicole Kidman) personifies her inner struggles, her inner voice and inner vision which finally led to her artistic expression. Robert Downing Jr. is disguised under a full body of fur. Downing, representing Diane’s core self, is afflicted with a hair growth condition that makes him a side show freak and an outcast. Diane slowly develops a relationship with this outcast and learns how to transform him into a public representation – her art.

The film is a little slow but it is still a fascinating, strange depiction of a woman's insistence on discovering and bringing forth her true identity. If you feel that you have dark aspects of your personality that are better left untouched and private then you may enjoy this film and Diane's struggle. She finally found the courage to manifest herself even though the process was painful.

The movie does not claim to be a biography but rather an imaginary portrait. Its portrayal is like a fantasy and reminds me of the way M. Night Shaymalan tells stories.

Diane Arbus was an American photographer who died in 1971. Her work focused on people who would not normally be featured in a photograph. She photographed transvestites, dwarfs, and people who were in odd poses. Her photograph of two twin girls, one looking somber the other one slightly happy, was the inspiration for the twin girls in the movie The Shining. A copy of the “Identical Twins” sold for $500,000 in 2005.*

For More Information:

• See Diane Arbus’ photography online – great online photography book featuring Diane Arbus artwork.
  


• The movie starring Nicole Kidman: Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus
  
  


• Biography of Diane Arbus
  


• An interesting book that tells the stories of other famous people who turned their odd inner musings into art and success, people like Winston Churchill and Franz Kafka, is called "Churchill’s Black Dog, Kafka’s Mice and Other Phenomena of the Human Mind" by Anthony Storr.
  
• Learn more about famous women and their search for meaning. Visit Famiss- women making and discovering their own history

*Source cited: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/05/11/AR2005051102052.html

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Reinventing Yourself, Changing Your Destiny – Moonlight on the Avenue of Faith book review

When we claim a moment to be magical, we feel as if that moment transcends our normal experiences, our ingrained rules, and our cultural outcomes. Magic raises us out of skepticism slowly but if it is good enough, we become fervent believers.

Magic realism is a literary term describing how a story is told. The stories are grounded in reality but some characters have "supernatural" or larger-than-life abilities. With magical realism, women can take flight with dewy, velvet wings, fleeing a life that only had one outcome by trying to escape her iron-clad destiny.

Authors such as Gabriel Garcia Marquez (author of One Hundred Years of Solitude and Love in the Time of Cholera - which was just released as a movie) and Isabel Allende (author of The House of Spirits) and Gina B. Nahai (author of Moonlight on the Avenue of Faith) are some authors who write magical realism. Gina Nahai's character, Roxanna the Angel, took flight from a generational destiny and from Tehran where a woman's ability to escape her fate is so difficult that she must don silky white wings and leap from a balcony with all the faith that she will land softly in a new place.

"Moonlight on the Avenue of Faith" is a powerful, compelling, and fascinating novel depicting several women's lives, women who refuse to meekly accept the lot they were assigned in life and women who forged a new life for themselves.

These women didn't create their new lives without sacrifice, humiliation, pain, loss, or mistakes, yet they succeeded in reinventing themselves and elevating their human experience beyond the level of survival.

Mercedes the Movie Star used her extreme beauty to control the men who thought they controlled women. Fräulein Claude completely overhauled herself by denying her national heritage and insisting that she was of German noble descent. Alexandra the Cat also claimed a noble birth and presumed all the dignity that comes with such a claim. Roxanna the Angel literally flew away from her destiny until she could no longer avoid past and her choices.

The story is mostly about Roxanna and the effect her choices had on the people she loved, including her daughter Lili. When trying to make sense of her life and understanding her choices, Roxanna told her daughter:

"In the beginning, I tell Lili, there were many choices and I believing I was doomed, let them go to waste."

Even though Roxanna fled, she never believed she could truly escape her destiny and maintain any relationship with her family and friends - they were incompatible. This conviction led her to make devastating, painful choices.

I've heard the voices of many women who feel so trapped that they become convinced that absolute escape is the only solution. Famous female authors like Sylvia Plath and Virginia Woolf are two women who chose death as their reconciliation. Other women are not as extreme but they fight the chasm between who they think they should be and who they believe they are with an exhaustive force.

Do you ever feel like reinventing yourself or simply escaping? How would you do it? What would you be escaping? Is your reinvention completely incongruent with your current life?
I encourage you to read "Moonlight on the Avenue of Faith" (1999) by Gina B. Nahai to see how her characters managed their reinvention.

Gina B. Nahai was born in Iran who later moved to Los Angeles, California. She is also the author of a new book entitled "Caspian Rain," "Sunday's Silence," and "Cry of the Peacock."

--Looking for more? Visit Famiss, women making and discovering their own history

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Indian Writer Arundhati Roy Reminds Us About an Artist's Role in Society

Arundhati Roy's observation (taken from her book: Power Politics)


"Painters, writers, singers, actors, dancers, filmakers, musicians are meant to fly, to push at the frontiers, to worry the edges of the human imagination, to conjure beauty from the most unexpected things, to find magic in places where others never thought to look."

The Easy Way to Send Out Christmas Cards

I want to share a fun, inexpensive service with you. Jacquie Lawson is an excellent artist and business owner who created a service that offers animated cards that are fun and musical. The service is incredibly affordable. It costs $10 per year and you can send an unlimited number of cards.

She has a wide selection and offers great support. You receive an email when your card is sent and when it is opened. She has several Christmas and winter cards.

I hope you love her wonderful, easy, creative service as much as I do. Click here to access her electronic greeting card website.

Finding Integrity as a Woman

Achieving integrity, made up of public and private acts in sync with a woman’s true self, is life’s journey.

How do we present to others who we truly are? How to we make decisions reinforcing what we believe in? And sometimes we ask: How do we discover who we truly are? Integrity is a representation of an authentic self. It is a consistent display of our beliefs, values, and moral codes. But the path to integrity is littered with diversions and obstacles, making it challenging to truly live in step with ourselves.

First is the task of discovering who we truly want to be as a human being. We must strip away all the layers of other’s expectations, all our own weaknesses and fears, and then take a look at who is left. Do we like what we see? Is the woman who was buried beneath expectations and rules a woman we would like to spend time with?

Authors help us in this discovery processes by leading us through worlds, characters, and situations we might not otherwise meet. How does our integrity fit into a book’s representation of life? Do we agree or disagree with the action taken by the characters? Do we admire the character? Do we wish to emulate the character? Contrasting our own selves with fictional characters can help us discover who we really are. I focus on women writers, whose experience and tone help me define womanhood and whose wisdom or lack thereof help me define my authentic self.

The new book “Women Who Write” by Stefan Bollman explores the influence of femininity on writers. He writes: “Overcoming the traditional image of a woman is no more than the first milestone in a woman author’s struggle for her integrity. The second is to be able to speak openly about her own passions, or in (Virginia) Woolf’s words, to tell the truth about her ‘own experiences as a body.’”*

It is the second struggle Virginia Woolf spoke of, the struggle to speak openly about our own passion, that trips most women. Do you feel you can openly share your opinions and desires? Do you subjugate your own voice to others, maybe even doing it without realizing it? Are you the last to vote on a family decision? Do you find yourself saying “It doesn’t really matter to me” often? Why does it not really matter to you? Is it because you prefer a peaceful resolution to a situation and for some reason you think that contributing your own preference would rattle that peace? Why? Why are the preferences and opinion of our loved ones valuable but ours “not as important”?

When we withhold our own voice, our own opinions, our own preferences, when we fail to openly share them with others and to insist that they carry as much weight as anyone else’s, we fail to remember who we are. We are not the only ones who forget who we are, our loved ones and our co-workers do not know us either. Why? Because we refuse to share ourselves with them. We refuse to live openly and tell the truth about ourselves. We refuse to live with integrity.

* Women Who Write, by Stefan Bollmann, 2007 Merrell Publishers Limited, p.38

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

"A Weekend to Change Your Life" Review

A Weekend to Change Your Life: Find Your Authentic Self After a Lifetime of Being All Things to All People by Joan Anderson, a book review

There is no shortage of literature about the struggles of an empty-nester woman these days.

This non-fiction book plays nicely into that catagory. Even though I am not her target market, I enjoyed the book. It was a sober reminder, leading me to recognize that choices I make each day compound and if I do not make choices to develop my own talents and presever my own interests; I may find that I completely abandoned myself and then struggle to reconnect with my own voice.

Author Joan Anderson hosts workshops for women who struggle with knowing what they want in life because they spent most of their life giving to others. These women gave so much that they didn't have anything left for themselves.

Her method encourages women to escape to a beautiful, inspirational place. There you can be alone with yourself so that you are not tempted to do anything for anyone other than yourself.

In her own words:
"I am as unfinished as the shoreline along the beach, meant to transcend myself again and again."

Looking for more?
Learn about her retreats

Read her books
A Year By The Sea-Thoughts of an Unfinished Woman

A Weekend to Change Your Life: Find Your Authentic Self After a Lifetime of Being All Things to All People

A Walk on the Beach: Tales of Wisdom From an Unconventional Woman

An Unfinished Marriage

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

"You Can Heal Your Life" Book Review

Author Louise L. Hay did not grow up with a "charmed" life. She had a lot to overcome, and she did. She is the author of an international best seller, "You Can Heal Your Life" and the founder of the publishing company, Hay House. Her publishing company handles the writing lives of many people you know including Suze Orman, Deepak Chopra, and Wayne Dyer, just to name a few.



I strongly recommend this book even though it was first written in 1984. Her health book is timeless. It doesn't overwhelm with health jargon and yet it will really cause you to stop and think about how you treat and think about your body. I decided to go through this book one chapter per day. The chapters are short and it is easy to read one a day, even if you have a tight schedule. She presents interesting a model linking specific health problems and our daily thoughts and behaviors.

"Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens."- quote by Louise L. Hay

Louise Hay saves her personal story until the very end of her book. That disappointed me so I am going to tell you about her now. You see, her book is very positive and very empowering. I know that when I am struggling with negative feelings I try to dismiss empowering words because I expect that the person saying them is a super-human. You know the type, skinny, beautiful, rich, problem free… Of course they can be positive, they don’t have problems like I have. They probably have a house cleaner. I clean my house when I have insomnia at two in the morning. But Louise Hay started her life on the wrong foot.

Her parents divorced when she was just eighteen months old. It appears that her father left and her mother decided to leave her with someone else so that she could take an in-house domestic job. Baby Louise cried for three weeks until her surrogate caretakers told her mother to come get her. Children are never too young to be impacted by family problems. By the time she was five, she had an abusive step-father, and little sister, and the 1930’s Depression was beginning.*
She broke free from her awful family life when she was fifteen and at sixteen, she found herself pregnant. Not knowing how to support her child, she gave the baby up for adoption. Struggling to create a life for herself, she later married and was very happy until many years later her husband initiated a divorce. Again, she dusted herself off and became a counselor. She was very happy and successful as she helped people get through their own hard times until she was diagnosed with an incurable cancer.

Any woman who had been through what she had must be a survivor. She wasn’t going to believe the experts when they told her she was going to die. She began to thoroughly explore her past, possibly examine her beliefs originating from her societal stew, and to treat her body with absolute respect.

Today, she is a celebrated pioneer of the "self-help" industry and runs her own publishing company. Her company has published books by authors you may have heard of – Phil McGraw, Deepak Chopra, Wayne Dyer, and Suze Orman. Do you agree that a woman who has risen from such adversity might be able to help us with her book, "You Can Heal Your Life?"

In her book, Louise teaches that repeated patterns show us our needs. Each need is reflected in a habit and each habit is reflected in a belief. She writes about the battles many of us face when we are trying to change something about ourselves but don’t seem to be making any headway.
"How may times have we said, "I won’t ever do that again!"? Then, before the day is up, we have the piece of cake, smoke the cigarettes, say hateful things to the ones we love, and so on. Then we compound the whole problem by angrily saying to ourselves, "Oh, you have no willpower, no discipline. You’re just weak." This only adds to the guilt we carry."**

* You Can Heal Your Life, p. 215
**You Can Heal Your Life, p. 57

Also see the You Can Heal Your Life Affirmation Cards.


About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Christmas is for Bunnies?

If you are looking for a cuddly little Christmas present for a son, daughter, or grandchild, then please consider "Flossy" bunny. These adorable bunnies are made by Denver women who are learning new skills to try and support themselves. They are part of the Denver metro "Empowerment Program" which was started in 1986.

Where to get a Flossy Bunny:

Tattered Cover Bookstores or

The Empowerment Program

Click here to read article "Empowering Women, One Stitch at a Time"


Flossy The Feel Better Bunny is an excellent Christmas Idea - here's to bunnies for Christmas.

Can You Be a "Pioneer" and Not Be Free?

For all their show of strength,
their straight backs,
and strong will,
Charlotte Bronte & Edith Wharton still exhibit a profound entrenchment in social prisons.
Charlotte in her rewrite of Emily’s work so that it appears tamer, less grim and more Christian and Edith who lingered in a love-less marriage because divorce was unacceptable.

Neither woman, though pioneers, were truly free.
Are you allowing yourself to be held back by societal expectations or other prisons?

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Have you always dreamt of writing a novel?

If so, now is your chance. November is "National Novel Writing Month". There is a special online novel writing support program starting November 1st.

Visit http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/whatisnano to register.

The goal is to write as fast as you can for an entire month. Participants who finish the contest will find that they wrote at least 175 pages of their novel. The website has support features and you will know that you are part of a group trying to do the same time.

If you've been putting off writing that novel, maybe now is your chance. You will have the energy and support of thousands of others who are doing what you are doing.

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Add 2 Parts Humor, 1 Part Cynicism – Create a Life Full of Laughs

Today is playwright Wendy Wasserstein’s birthday. Her last play, “Third” will be performing at the Denver Center Theater for Performing Arts for a couple more days. There are few writers today who are highly intelligent and still relevant. Wendy’s wit embraced a classic liberal arts education, combining it with a baby boomer perspective. Her lighthearted cynicism helped her win a Tony Award for “The Heidi Chronicles”. Wendy was the first female to win a Tony as a solo writer.

In 2006, Wendy died of cancer. She was only 55. She was a respected New York playwright since 1977. In her last play “Third”, Wendy’s main character, Lisa, is a professor at an esteemed New England liberal arts college. She considers herself a culturally evolved person who embraces cultural and lifestyle diversity and yet she struggles when one of her students depicts a lifestyle she can’t stand. This young, optimistic, athletic male student represents the “old white American male” world, a representation Lisa cannot tolerate. The story is an excellent depiction of perspective and power.

I can’t help but be a little angry and frustrated at Wendy Wasserstein. Perhaps she would forgive me and maybe even appreciate my frustration as she created many frustrated female characters. As I mentioned, Wendy died too young. Her writing describes her loathing of exercise and healthy food. She comically dismisses a healthy lifestyle in her books “Shiksa Goddess: Or How I Spent My Forties” and “The Seven Deadly Sins: Sloth”. Critic Sylvie Drake wrote “[F]or all who knew her, the true legacy was having met her at all.”* I would have liked to meet her and would love to have more of her work, but she is gone from us.

Applying Wendy’s Success
If you read any of her work or see her plays, you can see that she takes herself very seriously when it comes to her craft. She focused on details and had a wonderful way of combing information into a new paradigm. She used her characters to comment on her baby boomer generation and offered entertainment to thousands of people – even those who aren’t boomers. To me, her greatest success is her ability to create laughter.

Looking for more?
Buy tickets to the play Third. Showing until October 20th, 2007

NY Times tribute to Wendy Wasserstein, her life and work. Look at the left hand side of the article for a link called “Wendy and Heidi”. This is a slide show of her life and work accompanied with audio commentary by Charles Isherwood, a theater critic of The New York Times.

'>The Seven Deadly Sins: Sloth – This book is part of a series of the deadly sins written by various authors. It is a funny, quick read for the woman who is tired of being an over-achiever. The message is remarkably similar to that found in "You Can Heal Your Life" and that is to simply be happy in loving yourself and accepting yourself.

The Heidi Chronicles – LA Theater Works audio version of the play. This is a funny, cynical story of a woman named Heidi who is an art historian. Her life depicts the American female “coming of age” in the Women’s Movement.

Movie- Object of My Affection with Jennifer Aniston - Screenplay by Wendy which is perhaps why it is so funny. This is unlike any other romantic comedy with hilarious, yet not too incredulous situations. This film is a blend of an exaggerated comedy with modern romantic complications and a “modern” family life.

Autobiography: Shiksa Goddess: Or How I Spent My Forties- A series of essays that are funny and seem to be representative of a theater-going New York City lifestyle.

*Drake, Sylvie, “An Uncommon Woman’s Legacy”, Applause Magazine. Denver Center Theater for the Performing Arts, Volume XIX, Number 2, September-October 2007, p. 20

Happy Birthday Wendy.

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Building a Brand So Sweet, it Lasts for Generations: The Story of See's Chocolates

An inspiring business success story always gets the juices flowing as the reader feels the flow of success and wise decisions bringing them along for the ride. Combine the rush of a good story with a story about chocolate and you have an irresistible combination.

It all began with the matriarchal figure of Mary See. Mary's recipes for chocolates and candies built the See's Candy Empire that has wooed America since 1921. See's Candies uses the finest quality ingredients and always has. That is one of the secrets to their success. Even during the Depression, they didn't cut corners. Their customers can always count on a quality candy and that is why their customers keep coming back. Does your customer have the same, quality experience over and over again?

The See Candy story is a classic American success story. They were descendents of Ireland, whose family immigrated to Ontario. Mary's son, Charles, was working as a salesman, selling ingredients in bulk to bakeries. There was a popular candy shop chain in Ontario and Charles felt that he could create something better. He and his family, including his mother Mary and her meticulous and loved candy recipes, moved to Los Angeles to open their own store.

It was popular in the 1920's to brand food products with a "trust-worthy, mother or grandmother" image. In 1921, the company that later became General Mills, created Betty Crocker, a fictitious woman who, in 1945, was voted the second most popular woman in America (behind Eleanor Roosevelt).* Charles went along with this trend, using his mother's photograph as the logo for See's Candy. This tribute not only reminded Charles and the employees where their great recipes came from, it also instilled the "warm fuzzy feeling" one has when we think of a gray-haired, plump woman's baking. We trust that it must be delicious. The logo and its emotional assurance and ability to generate fond memories of grandma's baking in some of us, is just one example of the cleverness Charles displayed when running his company. Does your company's logo have a broad, emotional appeal? Recently, logos have moved into the abstract or graphic look. Could your company's brand benefit from using a photograph?

Though the 1920's was profitable for the See's and they had several shops, the Depression of the '30s held them back a bit but they were able to keep their doors open and were even expanding by 1936. They renegotiated their leases, the employee salaries, and lowered the price for a pound of chocolate. ** All these measures ensured their success. Of course, they never compromised their quality so their brand was maintained. If your business has gone through lean times, have you been tempted to cut corners on your product? If you do then your customer cannot trust your product again.

Many business owners dream of selling their business for a lot of money. This was true for See's Candy. In 1972 the surviving family sold their business to one of the best businessmen in America's History, Warren Buffett.

I've highlighted only a few of the business decisions that led to the success of this company. Charles See was a visionary and a problem solver. He was committed to a course of action and took his family business to a level of success that few companies achieve. If you would like to learn more about this legacy and how you can apply their innovative thinking to your business, I encourage you to read "See's Famous Old Time Candies: A Sweet Story" by Margaret Moos Pick.

*The Betty Crocker Story, CS News book review, 2005

**"See's Famous Old Time Candies: A Sweet Story" by Margaret Moos Pick, (2005). p. 28



You can order See's candies online.

Book Review: Shaggy Muses: The Dogs Who Inspired Virginia Woolf, Emily Dickinson, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Edith Wharton, and Emily Bronte

Author Maureen Adams wrote a wonderful overview of these famous women writers in her book Shaggy Muses. She explores each writer's life within the context of their relationship and dependence on their dog(s). If you are a dog lover, you can connect to the strong bonds between the women and their dogs. A dog is always accepting and incredibly tolerant. These dogs were no different and constantly, devotedly listened to their mistresses recite their work without ever appearing critical. They also kept the writers from feeling too much loneliness during their literary solitude.

Even if you are not a dog lover, this book offers a great overview and introduction to some of the most famous women writers of English literature. I do have to warn you; however, some of the experiences these women went through were painful.

Pick up a copy of "Shaggy Muses: The Dogs Who Inspired Virginia Woolf, Emily Dickinson, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Edith Wharton, and Emily Bronte" by Maureen Adams.
Published 2007.

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

"Passion and Principle" the Life of Jessie Frémont

Jessie Ann Benton Frémont, and her husband, John C. Frémont, lived lives that embodied the pulse and experience of America during the nineteenth century. Their triumphs and tragedies reflected the tides of America's own triumphs and tragedies.

Whether it was the promise of Western expansion, the freedom of the Gold Rush, the desperation of abolition, the sordidness and ambitious political system, the luxury of the Gilded Age, or the humiliating poverty of the economic downturn in 1873, this couple experienced it all as if they were America itself.

Santa Fe author, Sally Denton captured their fascinating lives in the most interesting biography I have ever read. She skillfully presented a story, one that is as engrossing as a great Hollywood movie, and yet detailed with historical accounts. I strongly encourage people to read this book. It presents such a fascinating look into our nation's past. "Passion and Principle: John and Jessie Frémont, the Couple Whose Power, Politics, and Love Shaped Nineteenth-Century America" by Sally Denton.

Jessie Ann Benton Frémont
I am still trying to understand the character of Jessie. This is my first introduction to her. Her father raised her as if she were a boy. He included her in meetings with prominent American political leaders. He developed her writing skills and had her assist with his senatorial duties. Growing up in such an unconventional way gave Jessie the confidence to approach and demand respect from everyone, including President Abraham Lincoln. Her power was not admired by all however, and many strove to "put her in her place", but she was like a river. If she encountered opposition, she changed her course and carved a new path for herself.

In Her Own Words
"I only hope that the youth of this country will learn to evaluate the past in the light of our heroes' dreams as well as their achievements and this for their own sakes, since by the largeness of our dreams do we truly live." *

- Jessie Frémont (1824-1902)
American writer, political activist, and philanthropist


*Denton, Sally, "Passion and Principle: John and Jessie Frémont, the Couple Whose Power, Politics, and Love Shaped Nineteenth-Century America" (2007) p. 377

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Jane Avril, One Woman's Tale of Fame and Poverty

The fear of poverty and obscurity runs deep in the minds of many women. Decisions to marry, leave a career, provide sacrificial support of a spouse's career, raise children and caring for family are some of the reasons women find themselves in vulnerable situations. "[O]ver their working lifetimes, women spend a total of 11 ½ years off the job on average, versus only 16 months for men."*

One woman's tale of fame ended in extreme poverty. Jane Avril, a famous Parisian can-can dancer was one of the most famous dancers of her time. You've probably seen her depicted in Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec's posters or as Nicole Kidman's character in the 2001 movie, Moulin Rouge. She was a woman everyone adored and she brought in large crowds as she performed on stage. Yet, when she died, she had no money and no support.

Jane stopped dancing when she married a German artist and became pregnant. She cut herself off from her previous career and did not have a suitable replacement way to earn money.

Have you ever cut yourself off from a financially profitable job or career to tend to family duties? That is exactly what Jane did and when her husband died, she had very little of her own savings to sustain her. Even though Jane Avril lived in Paris in the early 1900's, her story is told over and over again in the lives of women we know today.

So how can we avoid her fate? The answer is to protect yourself and plan for the future. Women need to have a strong understanding of how to manage money. I am not referring to paying the bills. I mean that we need to learn how to invest in stocks, real estate, or businesses. We need to know what bank accounts we have and we have to actively manage them. If you take time off from your career, then develop another source of cash flow. With the help of a broker or on your own, invest in the stock market or other similar products. By taking proactive steps to ensure your financial security, you can avoid the sad fate of Jane Avril.

If you take time off from your career or if you leave career, how else could you make money? A great resource to help plan for your financial security is the book "Smart Women Finish Rich" by David Bach.

About Jane…
Jane Avril was her stage name. Avril is French for the month, "April". Her real name was either Jeanne Beaudon or Jeanne Richepin. She was born in 1868 and died in 1943. In 1889, she was hired as the featured dancer at the famous Moulin Rouge (a nightclub) in Montmarte.

Montmarte was an artist district where absinthe alcohol strongly influenced the youthful, bohemian attitudes of the artists, writers, and the Parisian nightlife. Absinthe has a colorful, interesting history. It is dubbed as "The Green Fairy". It is a potent hallucinogen and I believe it was while under the influence of "The Green Fairy" that Vincent Van Gogh found the "courage" to cut off his own ear and package it with love to the woman he admired. To learn more about absinthe, I suggest this entertaining book "Absinthe: History in a Bottle".

*Bach, David. "Smart Women Finish Rich" Broadway Books, New York, NY 2002. p. 18

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Book: Goddess in Everywoman

This book has been around a long time. Unfortunately, I just read it. I would have fared better in life and my own psychology had a read it some time ago. The book is less technical and academic than The Goddess Within by Jennifer Barker Woolger and Roger Woolger (which is also an excellent, insightful book).




In The Goddesses in Everywomen, I found several archetype female characters with habits ringing true with mine. I was amazed at how much I connected with a couple of ancient greek goddess archetypes. Author Jean Shinoda Bolen does a wonderful job connecting a modern woman's psychology to ancient profiles of dominant female characters.

Examination of the greek goddesses helps us understand why there are apparent "conflicts" in our own personalities. In my case, how could I thrive in the outdoors and still love and crave a big city? I thought this was a contradiction in my life and yet, according to Dr. Bolen, these traits are expected according to the goddess I identify with.

This book is also great to help you understand other women in your life, whether they are your family, friends, or co-workers.

Don’t delay like I did. Read Goddess in Everywoman now.

Looking for more?
If you would like to read articles written by Dr. Jean Shinoda Bolen, or see what else she has written, please visit her website.

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Belated Birthday Wish to Janet Frame, A New Zealand Author

Celebrating the Birthday of Janet Frame
August 28, 1924 – January 29, 2004
Poet, Novelist – New Zealand

One of the exciting benefits about film is that you encounter people you may never otherwise encounter. I rented a film, An Angel at My Table, by director Jane Campion. You may recognize Jane’s name as the director of The Piano starring Holly Hunter and Sam Neill.

As a film, An Angel at My Table was unusual. It isn't a film that I see would have wide appeal, nor would I recommend it universally but there are people who would find it very interesting.

The characters are strongly portrayed but the pace is a little slow. It did; however, give me an introduction to a woman in history of whom I hadn't yet encountered. It features the life of Janet Frame, a poet and novelist from New Zealand.

Janet grew up with three sisters and a brother but it seems that she was a very shy person and had a lot of trouble connecting with people. Her social struggles led to her admitting herself into an insane asylum for treatment. It wasn't until she gained popularity with writing and made friends with other writers and artists that she seemed to "fit in".

Do you ever feel that your creative activities practically save you? It is almost as if their voice, their manifestation buoys you in life? According to the criticism published about Janet's life, Janet felt as if her writing saved her life, literally.

Looking for more?
Listen to Janet Frame read her poem "Friends Far Away Die"

Read three recently published poems by Janet Frame. "The End", "The Happy Prince", and "Eater of Crayfish".

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

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Isabel Archer: Friend or Foe? (Book Review of "The Portrait of a Lady"

Book Review: "The Portrait of a Lady" by Henry James (American novelist), published 1881

Henry James succeeds in ushering our frustration with Isabel Archer from shortly after we met her, to the very end. His book ends rather too-life like, without resolution, without hope for the future, leaving the reader’s understanding of Isabel "in air". Or, as he says in his notes "en l’air".*

Isabel seems like the perfect heroine. She is poised, intelligent, beautiful, admirable, or so everyone tells us. But her actions and her own words hardly reinforce this view of her. In her own words, her thoughts are small and limited, and yet everyone observes that her ideas have no bound. So who is right? Unfortunately, author Henry James never helped us determine the answer.

This is the third time I've read about Miss Archer. I say Miss Archer for to me she will always be that. Mrs. Osmond, as she later evolved to be, seemed always to be a wrong note in my ear. Miss Archer has potential, opportunity, and adventure in her name. Mrs. Osmond is a trapped, sad, conventional woman. I suppose the true tragedy of this book is that our heroine was in fact both women simultaneously. Perhaps Henry James understood women better than I thought when he poignantly portrayed a woman’s double nature. Her double reality. Her double experience. How many of us are both Miss Archer and Mrs. Osmond? How many of us have unlimited potential that we steadfastly keep under lock and key? Why do we do this? Is it because we do not know our heart? James didn’t think so. It seemed that Isabel (for now we must admit she is both women), clearly knew her heart. Sure, she fell victim at times but she clearly knew what she wanted when she wanted it. I will not pretend to understand what it was she wanted. Three readings of this novel still leave me in the dark. It seems that most of her friends, perhaps all of her friends in the story also never really knew what she wanted. That was little matter to Isabel. In this she never wavered.

So why did Isabel put duty or pride above her freer nature? Was it that so much freedom was too much for her? She hinted at such when she dismayed that she was given such a large fortune by her uncle and it seemed right to her that rather than keep it for herself, she find a poor gentleman (the vile Mr. Osmond) to bequeath it too. She was unsettled in her freedom and found it wanting. She thought that a quiet, settled life as the wife of a gentleman was better, why? I am left with many questions about this heroine.

I would love to know your thoughts. Perhaps if I come to understand her, I shall see myself in a clearer light.

Looking for more?
1. From an essay by Patricia Rohrer, Teachers College, Columbia
“Something terribly human yet terribly flawed about the project of Isabel Archer, the heroine of Henry James' Portrait of a Lady, has always drawn me to this story of one individual's quest for a meaningful life. A spirited and intelligent young woman, Isabel unexpectedly inherits a fortune, freeing her particularly from the need to marry. Defying convention, as well as the aid and advice of her closest friends, Isabel pursues her dream of an "original" life with cool, confident independence.” Continue reading…

2. There is a 1996 movie version of The Portrait of a Lady, starring Nicole Kidman. I haven’t been able to locate a copy but it is directed by Jane Campion who is also the director of The Piano.

3. Pick up your own copy of "The Portrait of a Lady" by Henry James.

*Henry James, “The Portrait of a Lady”. Penguin Classics Edition, 1984 (original printing 1881), Appendix “From the Notebooks of Henry James”, p. 640

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Movie Review: Woman Sesame Oil Maker

This 1993 Mandarin film with English subtitles depicts a woman who builds a successful business but who still has to balance taking care of her mentally handicap son and drunk husband. Xiang, a woman who is about 35 years runs a very small sesame seed oil company. She and her children process the oil by hand. Her fortunes change drastically when a female Japanese investor decides to export the oil. This movie depicts a strong, self-sufficient business woman who is still trapped by excessive family responsibilities and her culture.

I found this movie at my local library or you can find it on Amazon.com

This film was directed by Chinese director Xie Fei. It won "Best Actress" at the Chicago International Film Festival and a "Golden Bear" at the Berlin International Film Festival.

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Eating Spinach Salads Could Rob Bones of Calcium

Do you love spinach salads? If so, you could be depleting the calcium in your bones.

I know, spinach is supposed to be good for you and it is, but uncooked spinach contains oxalic acid which prevents calcium absorption.

The excellent cookbook Nourishing Traditions: The Cookbook that Challenges Politically Correct Nutrition and the Diet Dictocrats recommend that we only eat spinach salads occasionally. If you cook the spinach, then the oxalic acid is neutralized and does not interfere with calcium absorption. Nourish Traditions is an excellent resource with numerous explanations of the nutritional benefits of whole foods.

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

World's Shortest Fairy Tale

This fun little story came my way via email.

"Worlds Shortest Fairytale"

Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy, "Will you marry me?" The guy said
"No" and the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, drank
martinis with friends, always had a clean house, never had to cook, had a
closet full of shoes and handbags, stayed skinny, and was never farted on.
"The End."

Edith Wharton - American Novelist

Edith Wharton was an American Novelist who is most famous for "The Age of Innocence" (1920) which won the Pulitzer Prize in 1921 and "The House of Mirth" (1905) and "Ethan Frome" (1911).

She lived from January 24, 1862- August 11, 1937

Her Contemporaries & Companions Included:
President Theodore Roosevelt, and authors Henry James, Sinclair Lewis, and Earnest HemingwayThe Combination of Her Sense of Design and Her Writing TalentsShe began her writing career with the book "The Decoration of Houses" (1897) which became a surprise success.

It is hard to imagine a time before Martha Stewart, Sunset Magazine, and The Travel Channel, but Edith Wharton was the pioneer of these programs we are now addicted to. Wharton gave readers their first glance into home design and landscape design. She focused on off-the-beaten path Italian villas. She rode in some of the first automobiles all throughout the Italian countryside to find and recreate glorious Italian gardens.

One of her most exciting projects, and of which she stated was an even better accomplishment than "The House of Mirth" was the design and building of her summer estate home in Lenox, Massachusetts called "The Mount".

You can tour this fantastic home and understand the writer even more by walking in her footsteps.
Tour Edith Wharton Estate "The Mount".

A modern, gorgeous book about Edith and her journeys in Italy is "Edith Wharton's Italian Gardens" by Vivian Russell. This is a coffee table sized book.

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

What is Happening to Our Food?

When I was a teenager, I ate a lot of junk food. I weighed more than I should, but I was just a little chubby and I didn’t gain weight like kids are today. I don’t know that I ate any better than kids today, but perhaps the quality of junk food and other food is much worse today than it was when I was growing up. I think there are more preservative fats and far more chemicals added to food today than ever before. My theory is that there are too many chemists graduating from college and they need gainful employment somewhere. Rather than divert their genius to sustainable energy for homes and vehicles, we employ them at food manufacturing facilities where they make food that lasts on a shelf for 18 months and last in our bodies, how much longer?

An article of particular concern came out on December 26, 2006. It is entitled: "Despite Lack of Science and Strong Public Concern, FDA Expected to OK Food From Cloned Animals" . The press release states: "The assessment and the agency's expected endorsement of cloned food comes despite widespread concern among scientists and food safety advocates over the safety of such products. The move to market cloned milk and meat also flies in the face of dairy and food industry concern and recent consumer opinion polls showing that most Americans do not want these experimental foods." To read more go to http://www.organicconsumers.org/

About the author: Allison Frederick is a writer and online marketing educator for other creative women. www.FaMissWomen.com offers free Web 2.0 resources. She is also the author of an upcoming novel, A Portrait of Josephine, an academic-lite thriller. Find out how to receive a free copy of the novel by visiting www.portraitofjosephine.com

Memorial Day Video - Remembering Our Soldiers

If you made it through Memorial Day weekend without having the time to think about our soldiers in Iraq, of their sacrifice, and of their challenges, and of their commitments, then I encourage you to watch this popular video on Youtube.

According to what I've heard, the video was put together by Lizzie Palmer, a 15 year old. Teenagers have a succinct, poignant expression sometimes. We can all benefit. Watch video “Do You Remember Me?”